Introduction

The interview

How to identify a nightmare workplace

How to get a job you're not qualified for

Fancy restaurant

CEO

Forklift operator

Brain surgeon

Shoe salesperson

How to survive the interview

If you are late

If you are asked a difficult or leading question

How to know if you are tanking

How to disguise a tattoo

How to disguise a piercing

How to fake a tattoo or piercing

People skills

How to deal with a nightmare boss

The control freak

The buddy

The workaholic

The teller of bad jokes

How to deal with a nightmare co-worker

The talker

The kiss-up

The TMI (Too Much Information)

The gossip

How to deal with a nightmare customer

Irate retail customer

Abusive restaurant patron

How to survive the office picnic

If you become intoxicated

How to make an impromptu toast

How to survive a workplace romance

The break-up

On-the-job survival

How to survive in a tiny workspace

Cubicle

Truck cab

Tollbooth

How to sneak out of a meeting

Sneak out in plain sight

Sneak out using a distraction

Crawl under the table

How to stay awake during a meeting

How to cover your mistakes

Expunge a nasty e-mail

Salvage a coffee-stained document

Spill on a patron

Fix a bad haircut

How to survive if you are caught slacking

Surfing the web

Asleep at your desk

How to survive a nightmare business trip

Flying in coach

Lost luggage

Cheap hotel

Dull town

How to enhance your stature

Pretend you have an assistant

Attend meetings to which you are not invited

Move into an unoccupied office

Alter your business cards

Use props

Look busier than you are

Start a helpful rumor

How to avoid downsizing

Make yourself seem indispensable

Workplace emergencies

How to treat workplace injuries

Stapled finger

Deep-fryer burn

Finger cut on deli slicer

How to retrieve a candy bar stuck in the lunchroom vending machine

How to thwart a lunch thief

How to spot a shoplifter

How to thwart a shoplifter

How to survive if trapped in

A bathroom

A supply closet

A walk-in freezer

A lion cage

How to remove a tie caught in the document feeder

How to fix a dented company vehicle

Make a glue puller

How to restore a shredded document

How to unclog the office toilet without a plunger

If pushing the handle does not flush the toilet

How to escape a stockroom avalanche

How to extricate yourself from an avalanche

How to clean up a spill in aisle seven